Ambition, Ability, and Integrity

by Jay Johansen

I once read an article about marriage that said that what most women want in a husband is a man with "ambition, ability, and integirty". The author briefly mentioned that if a man had only one or two of these things, that wasn't good enough.

I'm sure the author went on to profound insights about love and marriage, but I got to thinking about the combinations of these three things.

Think about it: If a man has ambition, ability, and integrity, he is likely to be an upstanding and successful man. I can certainly see how this would be the sort of man that women would want. But only one or two of the three makes him a loser in one way or another.

Consider all the possible combinations of these three attributes. A little math, "combination theory", shows that there are eight possible combinations: three things, each with two possibilities, gives 2 x 2 x 2 = 8 combinations.

Ambition Ability Integrity Result
X X X Admirable, successful man. It's easy to see how this is the sort of man a woman would want.
X X Unscrupulous businessman, con man, successful criminal, politician. Some women will like this kind of man: the "bad boy syndrome". Mostly these are the kind of people who do the most harm to society: they don't care about others or even enjoy hurting others, and they are capable enough to do it.
X X Nice guy who tries hard but is a perennial failure. Clearly a very sad case.
X Schemer. One of those people who always has a million schemes to make money but nothing ever comes of them. Or if his lack of integrity is more extreme, he may be a henchman: not smart enough to become a master criminal himself, so he becomes a follower of some other criminal. Or maybe he's in and out of prison all the time because he attempts all sorts of crimes but always gets caught.
X X A wasted life. Someone who could accomplish great things, but never does. He's smart or creative or whatever, but doesn't have the drive to ever accomplish anything.
X Parasite. He takes advantage of others and contributes nothing to society. But he's too lazy to do a lot of harm.
X Nice loser. He's a decent guy but accomplishes nothing in life.
Mean loser. He's a total failure in life, and he rages against the world for his failure.

Ambition	Ability	Integrity	Result
X	X	X	Admirable, successful man. It's easy to see how this is the sort of man a woman would want.
X	X		Unscrupulous businessman, con man, successful criminal, politician. Some women will like this kind of man: the "bad boy syndrome". Mostly these are the kind of people who do the most harm to society: they don't care about others or even enjoy hurting others, and they are capable enough to do it.
X		X	Nice guy who tries hard but is a perennial failure. Clearly a very sad case.
X			Schemer. One of those people who always has a million schemes to make money but nothing ever comes of them. Or if his lack of integrity is more extreme, he may be a henchman: not smart enough to become a master criminal himself, so he becomes a follower of some other criminal. Or maybe he's in and out of prison all the time because he attempts all sorts of crimes but always gets caught.
	X	X	A wasted life. Someone who could accomplish great things, but never does. He's smart or creative or whatever, but doesn't have the drive to ever accomplish anything.
	X		Parasite. He takes advantage of others and contributes nothing to society. But he's too lazy to do a lot of harm.
		X	Nice loser. He's a decent guy but accomplishes nothing in life.
			Mean loser. He's a total failure in life, and he rages against the world for his failure.

I don't have a point. It was just amusing to think about.

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June 17, 2011.
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